Tired of feeling disconnected in your marriage? Ready to start understanding each other?
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My husband & I were feeling disconnected as we kept butting heads & shutting down in difficult conversations. We felt lonely because we didn't know how to have meaningful conversations.
HE OFTEN FELT LIKE:
• I was trying to fix him
• Could never make me happy
• Manipulated & controlled
• Sexual needs unmet
I OFTEN FELT LIKE:
• I was carrying all the weight
• I got the leftovers
• Under appreciated & unloved
• Emotional needs unmet
Sometimes we felt little more than roommates - honestly, roommates do more together and have more fun with each other than we did.
We could go through periods of closeness and intimacy in our marriage but weren't sure when those were going to end due to some conflict happening. We didn't feel like we could trust each other to resolve tough situations.
I know it's possible for you because we've been there (and back).
When Jeff & I had differing opinions, we would fight to get our own way or to be right. We blamed each other for what wasn't working in the relationship because it was easier to see the problems in the other person. But no matter how hard we tried, we couldn't seem to get the other person to change.
One day, I was losing it on Jeff and saw my expression in the mirror. I was mortified at how hateful & ugly I was being towards the man I love.
I realized the more I criticized and blamed my husband, the more bitter and angry I was becoming. And that is not who I wanted to be.
What I realized is I needed to focus on myself and discovering the spouse I wanted to become.
The entire 3-part communication renovation system to help you stop butting heads & shutting down and start having open & honest communication that connects you. Because if you can learn to truly communicate, you can work through anything in life together.
That's when I developed...
Does any of this sound like you?
You're walking on eggshells, second-guessing what you can and cannot say because it might upset your spouse.
More and more conversations you don't know how to have are building up and limiting what you have to talk about.
Feeling alone and like you are the only ones struggling as you watch other couples enjoying life while you wonder if the marriage you long for is simply a fantasy.
Arguments, big or small, can leave you feeling disconnected for days and sometimes wondering if you married the wrong person.
You're often hurt, disconnected, and beginning to live more separate lives as you avoid conflicts, difficult topics, and just try to get through life together.
Replacing butting heads & shutting down with open & honest communication.
If so, how does this sound?
Having conversations that actually produce results & lasting changes.
Being teammates working side by side through the challenges of life.
Resolving conflict so past offenses don't keep coming up in new conversations.
Laughing & joking around with each other as you fall deeper & deeper in love.
that sounds amazing
We start by looking at what disconnecting ways you are shutting down, getting angry, defensive, being needy, disrespectful, unloving or critical of your spouse? Nothing is bad, broken or wrong with you, you just lack an understanding of your inner workings. Once the blinders are removed, you will have new levels of self control so you can choose new responses and connect with your spouse in brand new ways.
This phase helps you filter through the layers of the difficult topics that have been keeping you stuck and gives you new communication tools so that you can know exactly what conversations you need to have, how to have them and how to recover when you start to spin out.
Learning new things is of no use if you don’t put it into practice. These exercises will help you take what you are learning and actually apply it to your life and relationship. Through investigative questions and exercises, you will gain new insight and start putting into practice new approaches to communication so you can produce lasting change.
It is easy to learn something new, but then get frustrated and give up when you don’t get the results that you want. Lasting change comes through practicing the new skills and seeing the small nuances so you can make the necessary adjustments to transform your communication & start thriving.
All of that and more *is* possible for you (seriously!), and you'll learn how to get there with the Marriage Thrive
It all starts with renovating your communication through the course called Marriage Thrive.
These exercises will help you apply what you are learning & create lasting change.
Other couples in all stages of life growing along side of you is a game changer
"Marriage Thrive has helped us work through fights we’ve literally had for a DECADE in a matter of minutes."
Aaron & Jen
Let's get started now!
The best part is that within two weeks we
were laughing and having fun with each other again.
"We went from barely surviving to new depths with each other we had no idea were possible.
We are still learning and choosing open & honest conversations which isn't easy, but as we see what can come from these types of conversations, we realize how much our relationship won't survive without them. We would have been so sad if we had missed out on what was possible for our marriage.
Michael & Katelyn
Yes, It Really Works
"We were on the fast track to emotional divorce and this process saved our marriage."
We didn’t know what to do as we kept having so many conversations that ended up in the same place every time. Now we are breaking those old cycles by learning how to be honest with ourselves & each other. Working with Julia has been life-changing. We have so much new joy and excitement to be on this journey with each other.
Buddy & Jill
"We now know exactly what questions to ask to get unstuck in conversations!"
We knew there was a lot of things we weren’t talking about. Our common response was, "I am fine," and then we would move on because we didn’t know how to go deeper with each other. Since working with Julia, we are learning how to be honest and choose growth. We are much more peaceful and confident in our relationship.
John & Kaylee
You are not alone! In Marriage Thrive, you have a community of other couples who are applying the same tools you are to grow a lifetime marriage. We believe this support is vital because renovating your communication and growing your marriage can be uncomfortable, I know. As a community, we will walk with you every step of the way. And while we won't tell you what to do, we will encourage you, support you, give you feedback when you request it, and generously listen when you need it. Because we believe the answers you need for your relationship are in you and sometimes you just need help locating them.
As a couple, you're stronger than you think you are. But if you're anything like us, you need help to go to the next level. You just want someone to tell you what works.
You're in the right place.
"This is your day. This is the time to go after the marriage you long for.
"As we apply Julia's tools and coaching, what we are learning about ourselves and each other is nothing short of miraculous. We are having connected conversations with each other and our loved ones as we listen, trust, and communicate in new ways.
I'm Julia, your new relationship bestie.
I am passionate about helping couples create thriving lifetime marriages because when spouses feel connected and on the same page, everything about their whole life is just better.
I often felt ashamed of my reactions.
I grew up never wanting my parent's marriage, and while Jeff & I really loved each other, each disconnected conversation seemed to push us further apart. I often felt ashamed about how ugly my reactions could be towards the one I loved. I feared that my desires were not possible.
But what I didn’t know was once I learned to communicate openly & honestly, I experienced even MORE than what I originally dreamt was possible. In 30 years of marriage, I am blown away by desires I had decided weren't possible are actually now our reality, like my husband being romantic and actually wanting to have deep conversations (which he said would never happen!). Being able to truly see and hear each other is a brand new concept for both of us, and it has been a complete game changer!
but it wasn't always this way.
By testing this system one conversation after another within my own marriage and with the thousands & thousands of conversations with the couples I coach, I have developed a proven-to-work approach that builds layer upon layer allowing couples to truly experience a Communication Renovation.
As a couple you get to move through the 3-step Communication Renovation process and begin experiencing small wins right away, which helps you gain confidence and hope to keep moving forward. With the Going Deeper Exercises, you will actively experience new ways of thinking, responding, and communicating with one another. And then in the community, you can receive & offer inspiration with other couples applying the same tools and building thriving lifetime marriages.
What brought the two of you to fall in love with each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together is uniquely beautiful. At the start of Marriage Thrive, you will be asked to describe the specific marriage that you long for. What you want is different than what another couple wants and that is a beautiful thing.
Each step you take in Marriage Thrive will focus on your desired marriage. Rather than focusing on the past or what hasn’t worked for you, the focus will be on your desired future. When you get clear about the marriage you long for, it becomes like a north star lighting your way. There is not one right way to have a thriving lifetime marriage. There are endless options and that is what is so unique about Marriage Thrive - it simply invites you to become the best version of who you are together.
This course includes everything you need to thrive in marriage.
The results you get are up to you and your willingness to fully give yourself to growing a marriage worth having. The truth is that difficult conversations don’t go away, they just get harder to have. Your commitment to finding a way to have them now will determine the future of your marriage.
Becoming the spouse you are proud of being.
Building a communication system that will allow you to connect in every conversation no matter how difficult.
Learning to fight for your marriage rather than fighting for yourself.
Building a thriving marriage that your children look up to.
Healing the past so you can spend your precious time enjoying the present & dreaming of a future together.
Gaining the confidence that your partnership for life is solid and that together you can work through anything
We know you’ll love Marriage Thrive and the lasting changes it produces in your marriage. In fact, if you don’t feel it is serving you in renovating your communication and building a thriving marriage after 15 days of enrolling and completion of everything in the first three sections of Marriage Thrive, we will give you your money back.
The best part is that within two weeks we
were laughing and having fun again.
If you're ready to grow the marriage you dream of, yet you want to take a test drive of Marriage Thrive before you dive in, this mini-course is exactly what you need. The Connection Triangles module is a fan favorite and will have you moving from disconnection to connection in an instant.
Frequently Asked Questions
Counseling gives you an opportunity to talk about your past and how it might be affecting you now. Coaching focuses on the future you long for and looks at whether the choices you are making now are taking you away from or towards that future.
Because it is work at your own pace, you get to decide that for yourself. The optimal option is to give Marriage Thrive about 2 hours a week which gives you time for the course work, intentional conversation, and a time of enjoying life together.
We can't transform what we can't see. Julia is a relationship coach with thousands of hours of coaching experience helping individuals and couples obtain the results they wanted but feared weren't possible. Through coaching calls, she will help you transform in life-changing ways and guide you to see what you can't see about what specifically is blocking the results you want.
Yes, it is not uncommon for one spouse to join Marriage Thrive and work on taking responsibility for their choices. The beautiful thing is it only takes one spouse changing their steps in the dance to create a new dance. And often the spouse who wasn't originally interested sees so much change in their spouse, they suddenly are interested in participating.
Yes, you can add either Group or Private Coaching Calls to support you as you work through Marriage Thrive. You will find more information and details during the check out process.
Absolutely. Gaining these tools as you move towards marriage is the best investment you could make into yourself and each other. Some couples do this in place of premarital counseling.
I completely understand. Every dollar invested in your marriage is an important one! Your marriage is either dying or growing, and it is up to you to find exactly what you need to nurture it.
Still on the fence?